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The Bitch of Chiselhurst CavesMead can do many things it can even make you blindAnd the tavern wenches round these parts drive me out of my mind There's on such girl of whom I know who's been around the block For fifteen duckets and a bucket of milk she'll even roost your cock. She's for hire, baby Doff your cap and quaff your wine For the Bitch of Chiselhurst Caves is mine War your sons and tell your chums: She's the Bitch of Chiselhurst Caves If you take her home to stroke your bone and caress your mighty helm She'll tie you to the bed & ride you 'til you're dead, she's the finest in the realm When you're worn right through and your balls are blue and your dreams full of delight Don't be surprised if she takes all your gold and vanishes in the night "She wants my sausage" (But she'd better hurry up 'cos there's only one going) So hide your stash and bank your cash, be wise and mark these words: You'll have your way but you'll have to pay, for the best-laid supper can turn to turds |