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Hospital Hard-OnSitting in the waiting roomRead all the magazines Bored, so stole some bandages And hid behind the screens Wrapped them 'round my penis And I shouted to a nurse She took one look Then took my pulse Put my number in her purse Open up and say "aah" 'Cos the doctor's now on call Kneel down, stick your tongue out Doctor love is now on the ward Open up and say "aah" Take my hospital hard-on You'll thank me later When your symptoms have all gone Went into prosthetics Never meant to cause alarm Shook some old-boy by the hand And stole most of his arm! Gynecology beckoned put a gown on And some gloves Done 20 checks on 20 chicks And 20 fell in love |